


In the Night

by bestestbuddies



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends, a bit of angst, mild existential crisis, street artists, the graffiti fic no one asked for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-14
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-17 08:28:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9313523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bestestbuddies/pseuds/bestestbuddies
Summary: Dan Howell is a starving artist in the most literal sense, although his art will never pay the bills because it's technically vandalism, but who's keeping track right?A new artist comes on the scene and their work is keeping him up at night until Dan comes to one conclusion- "I have to meet him."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction in several years and my first ever phanfiction. I hope you enjoy!
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr at https://mybestestbuddyphil.tumblr.com

“Oh for fuck’s sake…” Dan grumbled, tugging his bag of supplies onto his back and trekking further down the road. The meticulously crafted plan he’d been perfecting for the past few nights began to fall to pieces in his mind. He kicked a stray piece of rubbish out of frustration. “Can’t believe this prick,” he muttered under his breath.

So much for finally bringing his latest creation to life. The man walked quickly to the nearest tube station. There was no point in trying to find another location that night. By the time he found something suitable, the sun would be rising and his odds of being spotted by a cop increased exponentially. Getting arrested for vandalism wasn’t high on his agenda. He certainly couldn’t hang around the monstrosity he’d just seen to get any hints about whoever had sniped his prime canvas. The only thing worse than getting arrested would be having anyone believe that he’d painted that… thing. If he ever did get caught near one he could always object, but no cop would ever believe him when he was carrying a bag full of sketches and spray paint. ‘It doesn’t match my aesthetic’ wasn’t really a valid defense.

Before long, the dark-haired man was arriving at his destination. He ducked down a dim alley. Using a dumpster as a climbing wall, he clambered up to the fire escape and began his ascent. Soft footsteps echoed down the empty alley. Dan winced when his bag clanged against the rail. The thin fabric did nothing to disguise the sound of the spray can colliding with the wrought metal. Thankfully, there was no rustling of curtains from any nosy neighbors.

Labored breathing joined the sound of his feet climbing stair after stair until Dna finally made it to the window adorned with frilly pink curtains, covering a window that had been left slightly ajar for moments such as these. He heaved the window open and ducked through it, shutting it behind him.

“Rough night?” a voice interrupted Dan’s grouchy inner monologue.

Sighing heavily, Dan sank onto the floor. “Someone took my spot, Lou,” he whined.

The pink haired girl held up a finger and left the room. Dan’s head sank into his hands. He’d hardly slept in three days because visions of a new painting kept haunting him. The bags under his eyes were so big he couldn’t even kid himself about appearing ‘normal’ anymore. 

Five seconds- or five minutes, Dan wasn’t keeping time- passed and a cup of tea was thrust under his nose. Tea wasn’t normally his drink of choice but at the moment it was comforting. Louise always knew how to set him right. “Drink,” she commanded.

He obeyed, though the hot tea scalded his tongue as he sipped it. 

“Now spill.”

“It’s been three fucking days. I just want to rest but I can’t,” he responded gloomily. “I thought tonight would be the night but some asshole has gone and put another fucking sun up!”

The suns around town were starting to haunt him. Bright swirls of yellow, orange, and pink were popping up everywhere Dan looked. It made him sick. They were too cheerful, too happy. Not to mention the gaudy colors were far too tacky for his taste. Worst of all, people liked them! His own work would be covered within a few days, whether it was by the owners of the buildings or they’d be defiled by talentless taggers who just liked to see their name in large, jagged fonts. Even disrespectful, wayward teens seemed to leave the suns alone as each painting looked as pristine as the day it appeared. 

“You could have gone over it,” Louise suggested.

Dan shook his head slowly. He’d told her before- no matter how much he hated the cheery paintings, he’d never cover another artist’s work. Only a select few business owners had bothered to repaint their exterior walls once they’d been adorned by the giant suns. The rest of them couldn’t just be supremely lazy either. No, it was more than that. People liked the damn suns!

“I was going to make such a statement. These people don’t even understand the inevitability of their deaths. How can they not see how fleeting and meaningless our lives are? How can they actually like this prick’s work? It’s just a damn sun! They could look up in the sky and see the same damn thing! At least I’m trying to enrich their minds and show them everything they’ve been missing.” Dan tugged at his hair, leaving his fringe askew. It was all so damn confusing.

“Here’s a thought- maybe some people like to be happy,” the girl said gently

Not everyone looked at the world the same way Dan did. If they did, they’d leave his paintings alone and learn to truly appreciate the message they left behind. “He doesn’t even try to hide them! Half of them face the bloody street!”

Louise rolled her eyes- not that Dan could see it as he began to slump further onto the floor. She snatched the tea cup before he could tip the remaining liquid all over the floor of her lounge. Her carpet had one too many stains from similar nights already. What a drama queen. “Now you’re just whining, dear,” she said bluntly.

Dan didn’t have many friends- just one of the perks of being a fundamentally introverted loner who tended to look down on others out of habit. Yet somehow Louise had stuck around for several years. She knew at that Dan was a ultimately a good person even if he sometimes had trouble showing it. In her time of knowing the man, she’d witnessed his many breakdowns- she knew the difference between the beginning of an existential crisis and when Dan was just being a pain.

“You’re jealous that this sun guy is getting more attention than you.”

Dan’s eyes snapped open. “I am not jealous! And I’m frankly offended that you would attack me like this in my own house.”

Louise rolled her eyes again. “You don’t live here.”

“Oh. Right. Well close enough.”

The woman’s eyebrow raised. “Are you going to start paying rent?”

Dan wordlessly reached into his pocket and extracted his wallet, showing her the emptiness within.

“That’s what I thought- just like your soul,” she joked. “You don’t live here. But you can kip on the sofa tonight.”

Fondness warmed Dan’s body as he pushed himself up from the floor and onto the overstuffed sofa. “Thanks, Lou,” he replied softly. “What would I do without you?”

The woman set his tea on the little table nearby and draped a blanket from the back of the sofa over him. “Freeze and starve,” she responded, tucking him in tightly. “Try to keep it quiet tonight.”

She knew there was no point in telling him to get any rest. Dan’s mind raced with philosophical worries when he was feeling creatively stifled. Louise pressed her lips gently to his forehead and retreated to her own room. Dan smiled at her back. He didn’t know what he’d done in a previous life to deserve someone like her looking after him, even if she pretended their friendship was normal in every way. Normal friends didn’t sneak in through the window at 2 in the morning to avoid waking up the sleeping child a few rooms over. 

Hours ticked by as Dan alternated between staring at the ceiling waiting for sleep to come and scratching away at his sketch pad. Normally when he couldn’t sleep it was because his mind was bursting with creative energy and unanswerable questions about life and the ultimately meaningless existence of humans. But something else had chilled him that night and it kept his mind from his typical worries.

Swirling suns had been popping up all over the city for weeks, each one more vibrant and intricate than the last. Nearly all of them were done in places the man wouldn’t dream of painting- the side of a well-used 24 hour parking structure, near the park, even facing the damn motorway. All the locations were too open, too exposed to passersby, and certainly too easy to be spotted by authorities who saw their art as vandalism (which, technically, it was, but Dan thought that true artistic endeavors shouldn’t count). Yet the art had only appeared within the last month or so. How did a new artist have the courage to put his work in such public spaces? Dan had only done it a few times and he’d been a street artist since he left home at 17.

As annoyed as it made him, he couldn’t deny the little bubble of respect blossoming inside him. Feeling his eyes begin to droop, his head dropped to look down at his sketch pad. He’d been so engrossed in his own thoughts about the mystery artist that he hadn’t paid attention to his own hand gliding across the previously blank page.

“Shit,” he grumbled, shutting the book as soon as he’d seen his own work.

But no amount of pretending he hadn’t drawn it would change the sketch. It wouldn’t erase the monochromatic sun, swirls of gray pencil entwined with darker gray and areas of negative space where he’d neglected to draw anything at all. There was no denying his fixation anymore and as he dozed off into a fitful sleep, there was only one thought on Dan’s mind.

“I have to meet him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you've enjoyed!
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr at https://mybestestbuddyphil.tumblr.com


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan meets Phil for the first time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't plan for this chapter to go like this at all but I'm happy with the result, enjoy!

Cold sweat ran down Dan’s back as he jolted awake. He groaned and reached for his phone. The bright screen blazed in his face declaring it to be eight in the morning. Nearly three hours of sleep was pretty damn good for Dan, even if it was spent tossing and turning while being assaulted by unseen nightmares. Fussing with the curly mop on his head, he headed to the kitchen to help himself to some cereal.

There was no point in calling out for Louise as the bowl in the sink along with a miniature version of the same bowl told him she’d long since started her day. Being responsible for a tiny human wasn’t something Dan envied. How Louise managed to care for a child and help piece his life back together was a mystery but he was grateful that one of them had their life together. Maybe he’d bring her lunch at work or something to say thanks.

Despite being a general wreck of a person, he hadn’t been raised in a barn and Dan took the time to wash all the dishes when he was done with his breakfast. He wiped down the counters, swept the floor, and refolded the blanket he’d slept with, draping it over the back of the sofa. When he was satisfied with his quick clean up job, he poked his head into Louise’s empty bedroom. He always felt a bit awkward going in there but she insisted on keeping a change of clothes for him in her closet, something he was always grateful for. As quickly as possible, he darted across the room to the closet, snatched the bag containing his backup clothes, and escaped to the bathroom for a shower.

‘ _Louise truly is too good for me_ ,’ he thought as he disrobed and dipped under the slightly too hot water. How many friends would keep spare clothes on hand in case a friend just happened to drop by? How many friends would leave a window cracked open so their friend could slip in without disturbing their sleeping child? Dan supposed she must not leave it open all the time, lest a band of thieves sneak in and steal all her stuff, or worse. Perhaps she just had a sixth sense about when he’d need her help or a kind ear to listen to his troubles. She didn’t even mind him using her hair products! A true saint of a woman. ‘ _Yeah_ ,’ Dan decided, ‘ _I need to bring her something_.’

He finished his washing up and donned the clean outfit from Louise’s closet before starting on his hair. As he dried and straightened it, he began to mutter to himself.

“How am I even going to find this guy?” he wondered, his thoughts wandering back to the mysterious artist. “I haven’t noticed any sort of identifying marks on the murals. But surely there must be something.” His own work tended to include a tiny ‘D’ hidden somewhere inconspicuous. After all, true artists sign their work. “Maybe I should go take a closer look.”

He flicked his fringe into place and deemed himself acceptable enough to go outside. In the daylight. What a sad prospect.

Dan began to gather up his things, pausing only to toss his dirty clothes and some towels into the wash so Louise wouldn’t have to deal with them when she got home. Perhaps that was the reason she hadn’t kicked him out yet- when he left, there was never even a sign he’d been there. He smiled to himself. His own flat may be a disaster and his social life may have crashed and burned leaving him surrounded by bits of flaming rubble but at least he hadn’t dragged Louise down with him.

He slung his bag over one shoulder and exited through the front door, hoping Lou’s nosy neighbor wouldn’t be spying out the peephole as she tended to do. As he locked the door, he heard the creaking of the door across the hallway as it opened. Damn it.

“Oh, visiting again Daniel?” the old woman’s raspy voice made his skin crawl. “If you’re not careful, people will start to get the wrong impression. It’s bad enough that she has a child and isn’t married, but imagine what people will think if they know she has men over at all hours of the day!”

Dan sighed. “I’ve told you before, Ellen, we’re just friends,” he replied, slowly backing away from her to make his escape down the lift. ‘ _Not to mention you’ll be the one starting those rumors. Nobody else knows me or cares that I’m here_ ,’ he added silently. “Have a good day, Ellen,” he said, turning on his heel and walking as quickly as possible to the lift, pressing the button, and slipping inside without regard to its other occupant.

“Be a good boy, Daniel,” the woman called as the lift dinged and the doors slid shut.

Dan rolled his eyes. He didn’t care what the crazy old bat said about him to her bridge club but he didn’t like the idea that she said anything negative about his only friend and her daughter. Being a single mum was hard enough without some nutty old lady criticizing every move Louise made. What kind of miserable person had to spend their life making things harder for good people who were just getting by in life the best they could?

“My gran says the same thing to me. I think it’s how they show they care,” a new voice said, startling Dan who unintentionally jumped, shaking the lift. “Whoa, sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me,” Dan objected. “And that woman is not my gran, and she definitely does not care.”

Looking at the man he was sharing the lift with for the first time, Dan had to bite back a gasp. Pale skin, black hair cut in the mirror image of Dan’s own, and the bluest eyes he’d ever seen, it was like fate was playing a cruel joke on him. Of course he’d have to meet the most beautiful man on the planet after barely escaping from the most unpleasant person he’d ever had the misfortune of meeting. And he didn’t even have something suave to say. The first words he’d said were snappy and rude. Of fucking course.

“Sorry, I’d just assumed,” the handsome man said. “My name’s Phil, I just moved into 10B.”

What? Somehow Dan hadn’t killed the conversation with his rudeness and social awkwardness… yet? Well that was a first. “Dan, I don’t live here,” he responded. He took the man’s outstretched hand and shook it. Long, elegant fingers too… ‘ _Fuck, this guy is so pretty_ ,’ Dan thought.

“You don’t live here?” the other man - Phil - quirked an eyebrow. “So you come here for fun to hang out with old ladies who don’t care about you and are not your grandmother?”

Dan could have melted into a puddle on the floor from the look of simultaneous confusion and amusement on Phil’s face. His social awkwardness was already higher than most peoples but if he had to interact with someone he was attracted to, that level went off the chart. “My- er- friend lives across the hall. I was just visiting and had the misfortune of running into Ellen,” he said after a few beats of silence. “My advice is to avoid her at all costs unless you want all your personal information spread to everyone else in the building who looks in her direction.”

The lift door opened as it settled on the ground floor. Dan fell into step with Phil unintentionally as they walked to the main door. For a moment, he thought it weird that Phil was following him but had to refrain from smacking himself in the forehead as he realized how silly that was. Phil had already been in the lift when he got on and it wasn’t as though he had a reason to visit any of the floors between his and the exit of the building. Of course he was going outside as well.

“So what’s the fastest way to food from here?” Phil asked, holding the door open for Dan.

‘ _Polite too… Shit, he’s going to be the death of me_.’ Dan’s mind raced, immediately jumping to thoughts of ‘ _I can never come back here again, Louise will have to move_ ,’ and ‘ _Why is he still talking to me? How have I not fucked this up yet?_ ’

The black-haired man followed him outside into the daylight. “I guess that depends on what you want. There’s a load of takeaway places that way,” he nodded his head to the left. “Or if you just want some groceries, there’s a little shop around the corner that way,” he finished, nodding in the opposite direction.

“Which way are you headed?” Phil asked with a soft smile. Was he… flirting? Surely not, things like that never happened to Dan. Possible because he tended to put on a brooding and unfriendly face, but Dan wasn’t really focused on the reason at the moment.

Which was he going? He’d decided to bring Lou some lunch and a quick glance at his phone told him it was already half eleven. He’d spent longer cleaning up and grooming himself than he’d thought. “This way,” he said, pointing to the left.

“Takeaway it is then,” Phil grinned.

‘ _What the fuck? Seriously, what the fuck?_ ’ Dan thought. ‘ _What is happening right now?_ ’

He managed to plaster a somewhat passive look on his face to keep his confusion and inner-turmoil about why such an attractive man would want to talk to him bottled up inside. “There’s a pretty good cafe this way,” he said calmly, despite his heart beating uncomfortably fast.

“Do they have pancakes?”

Dan nodded. “I think so.”

They fell into step again as they started down the road. Phil launched into a story about how he’d been attacked by a squirrel the day before as if they were lifelong friends instead of strangers who’d met in a lift three minutes ago. Dan listened, nodding and making noises of vague agreement during any pauses. All the while, he was thinking of how Louise was never going to believe this. He’d held a conversation with someone who wasn’t her for ten whole minutes! And the ‘ _someone_ ’ in question was cute as hell, though he wasn’t certain he’d share that detail with her. She might die from shock and then her daughter would be all alone. No, Dan couldn’t allow that kind of tragedy.

“Yeah, its teeth felt like little needles,” Phil was saying as Dan caught a glimpse of yellow out of the corner of his eye, dragging him back to reality.

He stopped in his tracks, slowly backing up to have a better look down the little alley they’d just passed. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” he grumbled.

“Dan? Are you okay?” Phil joined him to see what had caught his attention.

His eyes raked over the sun painting. It was smaller than the others he’d seen, but the colors were the same vibrant pinks, oranges, and yellows. The scale wasn’t the only difference though. Little rays of sunlight show out of the sun at various angles, all twisting and intertwining to spell out a word underneath the familiar picture. ‘ _Smile_.’

“Dan?” Phil repeated, more gently as he took in his companion’s despondent state.

“I’m being fucking haunted by these bloody suns,” Dan responded finally, shaking his head and returning to the pavement, hurriedly walking away from the mural.

Phil had to jog a little to catch up but soon fell into place beside the brown-eyed man again. “You don’t like them?” Phil asked in a soft toned voice.

Great, now the cute guy thought he was crazy, talking about being haunted by a piece of graffiti and having such a negative reaction to it. That wasn’t something normal people did.

“They’re just so-” Dan gestured randomly with his hands. He had no way to describe his feelings about the mystery artist and his work to someone who didn’t know what he did, and he certainly wasn’t going to out himself to someone he’d known for all of fifteen minutes, no matter how cute he was. ‘ _They make me angry because they’re too cheerful and people respect them more than my work because oh by the way I’m a criminal_ ,’ didn’t exactly seem like the ideal way to continue their interaction.

Luckily, they were coming up to the cafe Dan had mentioned so he was able to avoid answering and further embarrassing himself in front of Phil by announcing, “This is it.”

He reached for the door handle but Phil already had it in his grasp and pulled it open, again waiting for Dan to walk through before entering. “Thanks,” Dan said softly, stepping past the other man into the cafe, inhaling as he did so. He caught whiff of something vaguely minty before the scent of the cafe took over. The small establishment was always warm and smelled of fresh baked bread. It was comforting, a word Dan didn’t use often or lightly.

Phil stepped up to the counter and happily ordered some pancakes to go, “With extra maple syrup!” he said with a smile, while Dan looked over the menu, deciding what to get for Louise.

“Dan, do you like coffee?” Phil asked.

“Sometimes, but I’m more of a hot chocolate kind of guy,” he responded absent mindedly. Answering questions was difficult when he was trying to remember how much money was on his bank card. He wasn’t completely broke but doing something nice for Louise would set him back a little. She was worth it though- she spent far more money and effort taking care of him than one little sandwich would cost him.

Dan didn’t even notice that Phil had already paid and stepped to the side until the girl at the counter asked what she could get for him. He picked a sandwich at random and paid, quietly breathing a sigh of relief as his bank card went through. It would have been mortifying to have it declined in front of Phil.

He joined the other man off to the side to allow other patrons to order as they waited for their food.

“I think the person who painted them just wants to make people happy,” Phil said, breaking their companionable silence.

Dan turned to look at him. “What?”

“The suns,” Phil clarified. “I mean, there’s loads of people who just like to write rude words or draw crude pictures. I’ve seen a few of those suns around and they feel different. I think the person who painted them just wants to make people happy.” He shot Dan a sheepish smile, running his hand through his hair.

Dan had never considered the artist’s intentions behind his work. Of course, he wanted to know them and understand this person but he’d never given any thought to it beyond how he’d interrogate the mystery artist to find out what their deal was. “I guess we’ll never know though, unless they decide to start leaving notes behind,” Dan countered.

“Orders for Dan and Phil!” the girl behind the counter called.

They collected their takeaway bags and the girl slid two cups toward Phil as well, thanking them and telling them to come again. Phil handed one of the cups to Dan and took the second for himself. “What’s this?” the brown-haired man asked.

“You did say you like hot chocolate, right?” Phil replied with a momentary look of worry.

Dan nodded. “Yeah, but you didn’t have to do that.”

Phil shrugged. “Think of it as a thank you for showing me around a bit.”

‘ _Christ on a bike, he’s literally the nicest person ever,_ ’ Dan thought. This time, he beat Phil to the door and gave it a push, holding it open for the other man, who beamed at him.

They paused on the pavement outside the little cafe. “Where are you headed now?” Phil asked.

They’d been around each other for nearly half an hour and Dan was out of his depths. It was a miracle he hadn’t scared the blue-eyed man away despite his little tangent about the mystery painter, which had been the only hiccup in their conversation. He’d known Phil for so little time but already he felt like he’d known him for a lifetime- not to mention he was kind, polite, and hotter than the fucking sun. Who gave him the right?

“Oh, I’m taking this to my friend,” he said, gesturing to the bag. “As a thanks for letting me stay over last night.”

Phil’s smile softened. “That’s nice of you,” he said. “I’ll let you get on with your day. Thanks again for showing me this place. Hopefully I’ll see you around a bit, Dan.” His voice lilted up at the end, almost like it was a question.

“Yeah, see you around,” Dan agreed, unaware that his smile matched Phil’s, though he was completely aware of the tingly feeling that spread from the tips of his fingers all the way down to his toes when Phil said his name.

The black-haired man turned and began to walk home, giving Dan a chance to privately ogle him. “Damn,” he whispered to himself.

Almost as if Phil had heard him, he looked over his shoulder at Dan and gave him a little wave. Dan turned around and hurried in the opposite direction, a slight pink tinge on his cheeks. Of course he had to get caught staring, just when he was almost in the clear of making himself look like a total weirdo in front of a cute guy. Louise was going to tease him for weeks.

He shook his head at himself as he hurried off to the building where she worked to deliver her surprise lunch. She was never going to believe anything that had just happened. Dan was torn. He could not tell her anything, but then he’d have no one to talk anything out with. Or he could tell her everything and be relentlessly teased for a few weeks. It wasn’t even a question- he had to tell her. He couldn’t live with keeping this encounter to himself.

The man found himself equally torn about his last words to Phil. Would he see him around? _Should_ he see him around? Sure, he’d managed to seem like a normal person for the half hour or so that they’d been together but there was no telling how long he could keep up the charade. It might be best to avoid the other man altogether. He would just have to use only the fire escape to come and go from Louise’s. Then again…

A little space in his mind had been carved out for thoughts of the sun murals and their mysterious painter, but it was clouded over at the moment with thoughts of Phil’s impossibly blue eyes. Maybe seeing him again wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

On the bright side, he’d thought of a possible way to learn more about the mystery painter. The idea had popped into his head and he and Phil briefly discussed the subject and he couldn’t stop pondering the possibility. For once, even though he’d have to break one of his own rules to do it, Dan had a plan.

**x x x**

The next morning, Phil found himself wandering down the street toward the cafe he and Dan had gone to the day before. Those pancakes were the best he’d ever had and his mouth was watering just thinking of having them again. The brown-haired man had been awkward at first but Phil found himself chatting as though they’d been friends for years, not to mention Dan’s smile was so wonderful it had been practically permanently on his mind since they’d parted ways. Phil hoped the other man did intend to come find him again.

He was so caught up in his thoughts of the day before that he nearly missed the tiny addition to the sun mural. Like Dan the day before, he backed up and made his way down the alley.

The sun was unchanged, as was the message to ‘ _smile_.’ But underneath it, away from any other swirls of color, another word had been added in a bright silver metallic paint that caught the light, glinting as Phil moved closer as if it was purposely drawing him in. A single word, no, a single question that was the last thing Phil expected to see.

_‘Why?’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, that was a long one! I didn't mean for Dan to meet Phil just yet but as I was writing it just felt right and I'm really happy with how the chapter turned out even though I only hit a few of the beats I'd intended to. Oh well, more for next chapter!
> 
> You can also follow me on tumblr at https://mybestestbuddyphil.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan spends some time with his best friend and another chance meeting gives him the opportunity to share a little about himself.

“So how are you holding up?”

Dan was shaken from his daze by the friendly voice. Louise always knew when his thoughts were starting to consume him. Dan wasn’t certain how exactly it had happened but dropping lunch off to Louise the day before had somehow gotten him trapped in a twenty minute conversation with her boss who had mistaken him for a temp. Before he could correct the frazzled looking older lady, he was given a command to make five hundred copies of some analysis of some business form or another and instructions to see Janice at five to collect his check, which sounded pretty alright to him. Any money was better than checking his account to see a negative balance. He’d done well enough to collect a check for fifty pounds and an order to be there the next day at nine thirty. Thus, he was copying reports that may as well be written in a foreign language for all the sense they made and binding them together into a booklet using a contraption so ancient it may have been built by Johannes Gutenberg. 

“Well I haven’t jumped out the window yet so alright I guess,” Dan replied, stifling a yawn.

Louise shook her head. Only Dan could try to do something nice and end up with a job he didn’t want for a few days. “You’re just lucky any temps we get are paid here by the day,” she pointed out. “Most places use an agency.”

Dan shrugged. “Could be worse, I suppose. My landlord has been after me all week, maybe he’ll get off my back for a bit now.”

The blonde frowned at her friend. She knew better than to argue with Dan about money. It was a miracle he hadn’t been evicted yet. The last time she’d tried to help Dan find a job, he’d managed to offend several old ladies, teach a child some creative cuss words, and start a small kitchen fire, all in a single four hour shift. He hadn’t been welcomed back after that. 

Despite his failings, he always managed to scrape by. Rent got paid… eventually. He ate enough to not die, although Louise thought he was looking a bit too thin as of late. She made a mental note to stock up on some protein bars to hide in his backpack. She’d done it before, whenever she thought he was looking particularly gaunt, though they both pretended she didn’t. 

“You should come round for dinner tonight,” she offered. “The little one is having a sleepover at her friend’s so it’ll be just us.”

Dan nodded. Suggestions from Lou were more like loving commandments.

Down the hall, someone called for the blonde. “Never a second to breathe,” she sighed, grabbing her mug of tea and preparing to depart. “I’ll meet you in the lobby at five. We can walk home together.”

“Perfect, I have loads to tell you anyway,” Dan said as he collected a stack of copied papers and added them to the overflowing mess on his little work station.

“About what?” Louise perked up, sensing fresh gossip. They hadn’t swapped stories in at least a month due to Dan’s recent downwards spiral. The voice down the hall called her name again, louder. “Damn. You’re a dirty tease, Dan Howell,” she pointed an accusing finger at him. “Whatever you have to tell me better be good. If it’s not, you’ve got until five to make something up.”

She took her tea and exited before the voice called for her again, leaving Dan alone with his thoughts and his boring report copying again. Although he’d decided to tell her about his encounter with Phil, he’d chickened out the day before when he brought her lunch. Because yes, he was going to tell her, but he’d been distracted by his plan, executed in the cover of darkness.

He’d passed by the cafe and nearby sun mural on his was into the building where Louise worked and seen his one word addition to the painting, but no response. Perhaps he hadn’t allowed enough time. Or perhaps the mystery artist wasn’t prone to revisit his paintings the same way Dan was. Either way, Dan’s mind was far too busy deciding the best way to discover the identity of his rival to do the story of meeting Phil justice.

Dan fell easily back into the monotonous task of binding reports together, giving him plenty of time to dwell on both the mystery artist and how much of his encounter with Phil he wanted to share with Louise. Part of him wanted to tell her everything but selfishly, he wanted to keep Phil all to himself- his own little secret to brighten his bad days. He’d even managed to sleep for five full hours the night before without any nightmares. All her remembered upon waking from his dream was a pair of striking blue eyes that left him suspended in a happy daze until a passing siren jolted him back to reality.

Five o’clock couldn’t come fast enough. The moment the minute hand ticked onto the 12 mark, Dan was off. He’d already dropped off all five hundred reports to Susan in the human resources department- at least, he hoped that was Susan- and he was on his way to Janice to pick up another check. Two days of boring but easy work were paying off, literally. He’d have to give most of the hundred pounds he’d made to his landlord to finish off his rent payment for the previous month but he’d still be able to buy a few essentials. Food was important to sustain life and all that, but if he was frugal enough, he might be able to stretch the money far enough to get a new paint color.

Dan met Louise in the lobby at ten after five and they set off to her apartment. They chatted about their day- mainly Dan listening to his friend complain about how, even after five years of working for the same company, she was still treated like an intern. Dan just nodded in agreement. He’d been instructed to arrive at nine the next morning but he had no plans to go. Rent was covered and he didn’t think he could survive another mind numbing day of photocopying page after page of meaningless business drivel.

He held the door to Louise’s apartment building open for her to enter first, then offered her his arm. “Why, thank you kind sir!” she took his arm, giggling. “What’s got you in such a good mood today? Does this have anything to do with what you wanted to tell me about?”

Dan was spared having to answer before they were safely behind closed doors by a ding from the lift. Ahead of them, the lift doors started to close as the person inside selected their floor. “Oh no, hold the lift, please!” Louise called to them.

Miraculously, the person inside obliged and the doors opened once more. Lou and Dan hurried arm-in-arm into the lift, nearly smacking their heads on a bunch of leaves from the giant plant the lift’s occupant was holding. 

“Thank you, this lift is so slow we’d have been waiting ages for it,” the blonde gushed. 

“It’s no problem, I understand. It took me ages to get moved in waiting for it,” a deep voice responded. “Oh, hello Dan,” it continued.

_Shit._ Dan looked up and peered around the leaves to confirm his suspicion. Dark hair, pale skin, dreamy eyes. _Shit._

“Hey Phil,” he said as casually as possible. He fidgeted with his jacket and dropped Louise’s arm from his. Hopefully Phil hadn’t noticed that. Dan had no expectations that anything would or could happen with the other man but having a lady on his arm did nothing to help him appear available. “Do you need any help with that?” Dan asked.

The plant looked heavy. Louise looked at Dan like he’d grown a second head, although she had to grace not to say anything. The moment they were alone, he was going to be buried in teasing questions.

Phil chuckled. “No thanks, Winston and I will be fine!”

_‘What kind of name is that?’_ Dan wondered. He couldn’t help but smile back at Phil. “You absolute spork. You named you plant Winston?”

“Well, yeah. Does he look like a Jeremy to you?” Phil replied, as though it was the name selection that perplexed the brown-eyed man, not the mere concept of naming flora.

Dan ignored Louise’s continued wide-eyed look and the bright smile on her face. He was so in for it later. The lift dinged and Dan looked up to see they’d gone a floor too high. They’d forgotten to select their floor when they got on. This was Phil’s floor- one above Louise. “I think this is you, Phil,” Dan said, throwing his arm out to keep the lift doors open for the other man to exit. 

“Thanks, Dan,” Phil said gratefully. “See you around.”

“Yeah, definitely,” Dan agreed, watching the others’ retreating back, completely oblivious to his companion staring at him with her jaw on the floor. She’d never seen him interact with another human for longer than five seconds without saying something awkward, embarrassing or offensive.

The lift dinged angrily that the doors still couldn’t close due to Dan’s arm being in the way. Phil looked back to see the source of the noise. Dan gave a little wave and ducked back into the lift, cheeks flushing, and smacked the button for one floor below.

Before the doors had even closed all the way, Louise erupted into laughter. “Oh my god, Dan, what the hell?” she managed to squeak out between giggles. “You’re telling me everything right now!”

Dan rolled his eyes and escorted her into her apartment once the lift stopped on their desired floor. The moment they were inside, the story of meeting Phil spilled from his lips like a waterfall of nervous energy and tension. The blonde busied herself with cooking them a hearty pasta dinner as Dan shared every detail, from his unpleasant conversation with Ellen to Phil buying him hot chocolate, and every breath taken in between. She took in every detail without interrupting except for when she was carrying hot pans and Dan was in her way; she had always been a great listener. 

By the time he was finished relaying every single second of his encounter with Phil, they were halfway through their meal and even further into a large bottle of white wine.

“Holy shit, Dan,” she said when he finally finished. “You need to go up there right now and get his number.”

Dan shook his head vigorously. “Absolutely not.” There were too many ways it could go wrong. For one- it was only a matter of time before his mood sank again and Phil saw his true self, consumed by existential thoughts and depressive episodes. Phil deserved better than that.

Louise was about to press the issue when Dan interrupted. “So I’m thinking of getting a proper job again,” he announced. Anything to steer the conversation away from the dangerous idea of getting too close to Phil. They could revisit the subject to analyze every detail of the encounter once she got her head out of the clouds.

“Really? Where?” Lou took the bait, thank goodness.

Dan shrugged. “I’m going to look around tomorrow and see what’s out there.”

Louise smiled softly at her friend. “That sounds wonderful. I’m proud of you.” She opened her mouth to say something else but was interrupted by the phone ringing.

She excused herself to go get it and Dan breathed a sigh of relief as he finished off his glass of wine. He briefly entertained the idea of pouring another but stopped himself. He genuinely did intend to go job hunting the next day while he had the motivation to do anything and it wouldn’t do him any good to have a headache. Plus another glass would only serve as fuel to follow through with Lou’s suggestion to knock on Phil’s door and get his number.

The longer Louise was gone, the more time Dan had to analyze his second meeting with the handsome but strange man. What kind of grown ass adult was mature enough to look after house plants, yet gave them names like Winston? Dan’s type, apparently.

Phil’s hair had been pushed back probably to avoid getting his fringe caught on any of the plant’s stalks and Dan would be lying if he didn’t say the sight made him a little flustered. And his arms, though thin, had shown some definition that Dan couldn’t ignore. Phil didn’t strike him as an exercise fiend but anything was possible. After all, they barely knew each other.

Louise came back into the room looking distressed. “What’s wrong?” Dan asked.

“I need to go get the little one,” she said, moving around the room, gathering her jacket and handbag. “Apparently she’s breaking out in spots. She must be allergic to something they had for dinner. They’re taking her to the hospital. I’m going to meet them there.”

“Do you want me to come?”

Louise shook her head. “No. Can you just lock up when you leave?”

“I’ve left your keys at my flat,” he said sheepishly, feeling very sorry for the worried mum. “Don’t fret. I’ll lock up behind you and I’ll take the window. Go take care of your daughter.”

Louise planted a kiss on his forehead and dashed out of the flat. True to his word, Dan immediately locked the door behind her. Although he wasn’t fond of children in general, he had a soft spot for Louise’s daughter. She was practically his niece. Dan knew better than to interfere though. Lou was super-mum; she had everything under control. 

Their friendship had spanned so long he couldn’t imagine how anyone could walk away from two people with so much love to give. Their loss, his gain. They were undoubtedly a family.

Dan looked at their dinner mess and began to clean up. The last thing Lou needed when her child was sick was a mess. He cleared the plates and stored the leftover pasta in the fridge. He corked the wine and placed it where no little hands could accidentally knock it over. After wiping down the table and washing all their dishes, he went to his bag and extracted his sketch book. The least he could do was try to make the little one smile. 

Within minutes, he’d drawn a cute little cartoon of a curly haired girl getting a hug from Winnie the Pooh. _‘Feel better soon. Love, Uncle Dan’_ he scrawled in the corner. On a separate piece of paper, he jotted a note to Louise. _‘Let me know when you’re both home safe. Call if you need anything. I’ll check on you both tomorrow. -Dan’_

He left both papers on the little girl’s bed where they wouldn’t be missed. They likely wouldn’t be back for a while but he wanted to clear out before they returned. Louise didn’t need to be worried about him when she had an actual child to care for. 

Dan packed up his stuff and double checked that he’d locked the flat before clambering out the window in the lounge. Forgetting the keys to Louise’s flat at his own was an inconvenience but it did have the added bonus of knowing he wouldn’t run into Ellen. The sun was already sinking beyond the horizon as he shut the window as tightly as he could from the outside.

“Dan?”

_Oh bloody hell… again?_

Dan looked up and saw the same black hair as earlier. “We’ve got to quit meeting like this,” he joked, instantly feeling awkward. The fire escape had been well… his escape plan to avoid Phil if he ever needed to, yet here the object of his desire sat on the grate above him, looking down through the wrought metal at him. “What’re you doing out here?” Dan asked, frozen in place. He couldn’t run and pretend Phil wasn’t there, but stepping up to join the other man without an invitation felt intrusive.

“Watching the sunset,” Phil answered, as though it was obvious. He reached out and patted the spot next to him, giving Dan the excuse he needed to climb up the flight of stairs and sit, which he did without hesitation.

They sat in silence, legs dangling over the edge of the fire escape, watching as the sun slowly descended below the horizon, the sky swirling with orange and pink light, mingling with hints of deep purple as night began to rise. Dan never took the time to watch something so simple anymore. The changing of days- the passage of time- was just as inevitable as death, though it wore a prettier disguise.

“Life would be better if we all took time to appreciate the little things,” Phil broke their silence, still watching the sky. Dan’s eyes flitted to the other man. “That’s what my dad used to say.”

Dan nodded, looking back out as the orange light began to fade, leaving small streaks of pink giving way to purple and navy. “He’s a smart man.”

“He was.”

Dan nodded again, not missing the implication of Phil’s use of past-tense in reference to his father. He didn’t pry. He considered family a taboo subject, unless it was about Louise and her daughter. The people he began his life with had been left behind for a reason and he liked to leave them in the past where they belonged. His new family was far more important to him.

They’d settled into another comfortable silence as the last of the daylight dropped out of sight, leaving only a canvas of navy, purple and black, dotted with tiny white stars that Dan could only see if he simultaneously looked too hard and not hard enough. Damn city light pollution.

“Do you always watch the sunset?” Dan broke their silence again after a few minutes.

Phil finally looked over at the brown-eyed man. “I try to. It’s like the universe is telling you ‘ _goodnight and congratulations on making it one more day_ ’. That and my dad loved sunsets,” he replied. “He passed a few months ago.” Phil’s voice hitched at the end of his statement. Clearly his dad had been an important man.

Dan hadn’t expected words like that from Phil. His heart started beating faster. Prying into Phil’s personal life wasn’t on his agenda but out in the open sky, things felt different. Nighttime was Dan’s element; it was when he felt most confident. Plus, it wasn’t prying if Phil was sharing on his own accord.

Without realizing what he was doing or thinking about the implications of his actions, Dan reached over and placed his hand on top of Phil’s to comfort him, gently stroking it with his thumb.

Phil looked back out to the cityscape but made no move to withdraw his hand from Dan’s.

“Do you ever think about why we’re here?” Dan asked suddenly.

“What do you mean?”

Dan didn’t want to drag Phil into an existential crisis or anything but he rarely discussed his thoughts on the subject with Louise. They knew each other inside and out and Dan knew she couldn’t understand that side of him. But somehow, in the night, obscured by darkness and already offering emotion revelations, Dan knew Phil would understand. They felt like kindred spirits, baring their souls to the world. Phil had shared a piece of his past in mentioning his father, something that clearly was difficult for him. Now it was Dan’s turn.

“Why are we here?” Dan repeated. “What’s the point of our existence? Ultimately, we’re no different than any other animals on the planet. So why are we the ones burdened by self awareness?”

Phil’s face contorted with deep thought. With anyone else, Dan would have felt he’d overshared too many of his internal monologues but for some reason he felt safe. He simply continued to absent-mindedly stroke Phil’s hand with his thumb as he waited for the other man to decide how to respond. The simple action felt right. Phil’s hand was smooth and soft; it was fitting for someone who seemed so gentle. 

“We’re here to spread joy,” Phil said finally.

Dan looked at him, expecting more after such a long pause.

Phil looked back at him. Blue eyes met brown and did not waver for a moment. “Just think about how a dog jumps when their owner throws a ball for them to fetch. Or how a child gets excited to find a coin on the ground, no matter the value,” he continued. “That’s what life is about. That’s why we’re here. To bring joy to others.”

Dan could have sworn he saw starlight twinkling in Phil’s eyes, though it was more likely from a streetlight on the main road. The way Phil looked at the world was so different than how he saw it. While Dan saw the corruption and deceit, the lies and sadness, Phil saw the light. He saw the goodness and hope. Dan found himself desperately wishing to experience Phil’s point of view for himself. His eyes briefly dropped from Phil’s eyes to his lips. They were so close. It would be so easy to lean forward and…

_CRASH!_ A rattle in the alleyway shook them from their locked gazes, backing away from each other, Dan releasing Phil’s hand from his grasp. They couldn’t see the source of the noise from high upon their perch on the fire escape but the damage was done. Their bubble of uninhibited conversation had burst.

“It was probably a stray cat or something,” Dan said, rubbing his neck and turning away, hoping Phil wouldn’t spot the pink tinge dusting his cheeks. “It’s getting late. I should probably get going.”

He could have sworn he heard Phil give a soft sigh. “Yeah,” the black-haired man agreed. “Your girlfriend will be wanting you back, I expect. Sorry for stealing you away for so long.”

Dan wished Phil would steal him away forever.

“You didn’t,” he replied, moving to stand. His legs ached from sitting on the hard metal grate. “And she’s not my girlfriend. She’s more like my sister. I don’t have anybody like that.” He’d never forgive himself if he didn’t make his relationship status clear to Phil.

Dan thought he might have seen a look of relief flit across Phil’s face as he shrugged his backpack onto his shoulders, but quickly dismissed it as a trick of the streetlights from the main road. Nighttime had a tendency to amplify and distort things that weren’t there.

Phil stood as well, shuffling his feet to regain feeling in his legs. “So do you always leave your sister’s place via the window?” he asked skeptically.

“It’s a long story. Short version, I left my keys to her place at my flat and her kid is sick so I’m clearing out so she only has to look after one of us.”

Phil seemed satisfied by his response.

“Well, I should go,” Dan repeated, wishing Phil would give him a reason to stay but knowing their magical bubble of openness had dissipated for the night.

“Yeah, it’s getting late,” Phil agreed.

Dan nodded and started to slowly descend the stairs of the fire escape.

“Hey Dan,” Phil called.

Dan froze and looked up. “Yeah?” he responded quickly, mentally slapping himself for sounding so eager.

Time felt like it was suspended as Dan’s brown eyes met Phil’s blue ones again. Moments passed, marked only by a slow breeze flowing through the alleyway around them. 

“We should do this again,” Phil said after a few beats of silence.

Dan’s lips turned up in a smile. “Any time,” he answered sincerely. “Goodnight Phil.”

He turned to leave before he got caught up in the moment and did something stupid that might ruin whatever it was they’d developed. Dan descended the stairs to begin the journey back to his own flat. He still intended to follow through with his job hunting plans the next day and he needed to get rest if he wasn’t going to look like an irresponsible wreck.

Above him, so softly he couldn’t be sure he’d even really heard it, that it wasn’t the universe using the whispering of the wind to trick him, Phil’s voice drifted down to him. 

“Goodnight, Dan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if never referring to Louise's daughter by name bothers any of you. I know Louise has allowed her daughter into the public eye but as she's young and (I feel) cannot consent to it, I don't feel comfortable using her as a character in this story. It was still important to me that Louise has a child though so in future chapters I may name the girl if she blossoms into a bigger part of the story. 
> 
> That said, I hope you've enjoyed!
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr at https://mybestestbuddyphil.tumblr.com

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you've enjoyed!
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr at https://mybestestbuddyphil.tumblr.com


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